Why can't I date a taller woman?

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Why can't I date a taller woman?
post #1

I simply cannot. I totally freeze up.

Ive had gorgeous women interested in me. Within the range of 5'4 - 6'0 (well the 6'0 was average, but whatever).

 

I get the mental picture of... being her shorter brother? Almost like drowning. Not knowing who is in charge.

That other people will not accept it, so I will FOREVER be trying to assert myself. That other men will flirt with her in front of me, secretly or openly laugh at me/us etc.

 

More to come if this gets replies.

Last Edited By evilbaga (2014-05-02 19:59:49)

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Re: Why can't I date a taller woman?
post #2

Brother, you need to get that idea out of your head! You will face rejection at your height more so than other guys because of rampant heightism, which we all believe influences dating choices heavily, but you're going to have to think like Boris (who we all believe is around 5').

 

Your style is going to have to be on 10, along with your charm and your game face has to be impervious. You're about 5'2 which is Prince, Kevin Hart range. Use this to your advantage (e.g. fun fact during conversation). But be sure your grooming is on point. I'm not going to give you the confidence mumbo jumbo, but really look into your experiences to learn dos and dont's. 

 

Most importantly, expect rejection, and walk in with the attitude that you don't care what happens.

Last Edited By ThatFlyShortGuy (2014-05-03 03:23:46)

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Re: Why can't I date a taller woman?
post #3

This is a society issue that we are all trying to tackle. You're going to deal with the flirting issue because people are douche bags. Stand up for yourself chap and get used to it.

 

I had to deal with that when I would go to clubs with my ex a lot. As for the "shorter brother" thing, that is in your head. Something like that will show her that you are insecure about you two being together.

 

Us short guys get accused of this insecurity thing a lot even when it isn't true most of the time so you can't let her think that you are.

Last Edited By minilinebacker (2014-05-03 03:32:16)

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Re: Why can't I date a taller woman?
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> ThatFlyShortGuy wrote: >

Your style is going to have to be on 10, along with your charm and your game face has to be impervious. 

 

I reject this completely. One can easily live without a woman... lots do. Lots of tall people as well ... its called MGTOW.

A woman has to be interested in me over other men to start. Without that, I will not approach, its a two way street. The problem is, when they ARE... that I freeze up.

 

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Re: Why can't I date a taller woman?
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> evilbaga wrote: >

I reject this completely. One can easily live without a woman... lots do. Lots of tall people as well ... its called MGTOW.

A woman has to be interested in me over other men to start. Without that, I will not approach, its a two way street. The problem is, when they ARE... that I freeze up.

 

This could be why might have issues. I get feeling a bit more confident when a woman approaches you or shows interest, but there is no way to realistically detemine that she is interested in you over other men. She could tell you that, and show you that, but still be lying. Come on, even an avverage woman is going to have tons of men approaching her. That's nature. You have to show her why you should be her choice. This changes if a woman is disrepsecting you. For example, a friend of mine had a woman take interest in him after he approached. However, she stood him up three times. Obviously, he is wrong for taking her seriously after being stood up once.

 

I take it that other guys were probably talking to her and she didn't take my friend seriously as a result. But they were talking on the phone every day. No one is talking about whether you could live without a woman or not. This topic was "Why can't I date a taller woman". Especially being a shorter guy, it would be intelligent to assume that she is going to have men of all heights approaching her (especially if she is an average height woman herself, which you mentioned).

 

If they are interested like you said, then my advice applies. Your should be on your A game. Your charm and game face should be impervious. Most importaly, you should be yourself (sounds cliche), but you are unique and she should be interested in you. Otherwise, forget it and move on to the next one. You have no time to waste (unless you want to waste your time).

 

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Re: Why can't I date a taller woman?
post #6

Aren't you guys afraid of taller guys? See, The way I see it, there is a downright instinctual reality - when you are taller than the girl, even if a taller (than you) guy comes along - you can offer the same stuff to the woman, and its understood he is a douchebag instinctually by other members of the species. But if you are shorter than her, this doesn't apply as much.

minilinebacker - how tall was your ex?

Last Edited By evilbaga (2014-05-03 08:07:18)

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Re: Why can't I date a taller woman?
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My ex was 6' and wore heels often 🙂

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Re: Why can't I date a taller woman?
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I'm not afraid of taller guys at all. Not sure why you'd be. One of my ex girlfriends is 5'7. Two inches taller than me.

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Re: Why can't I date a taller woman?
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> FefePapa wrote: > I'm not afraid of taller guys at all. Not sure why you'd be. One of my ex girlfriends is 5'7. Two inches taller than me.

Strange. Why SHOULDN'T you be?

They are taller, and generally heavier/stronger?

 

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Re: Why can't I date a taller woman?
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I'm strong and heavy too! I bench 315 and box. I'm not scared of someone just because they're taller.

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Valentine’s Date Ideas to Make Her Smile: A Shorter Man’s Guide

When religious authorities in the late Roman Empire moved to suppress the pagan festival of Lupercalia and elevate a feast day honoring the Christian martyr Saint Valentine—who, to this day, remains something of a historical mystery—they had no idea how widespread, commercialized, and romance-obsessed the holiday would eventually become. And guess what, sir—you, the one reading this, get to foot the bill for that centuries-old decision and its cultural legacy.

If you’re in a relationship, you’d better deliver. Even if your lady insists she isn’t overly concerned with the “small stuff,” the truth is that—speaking as a former hopeless romantic and lifelong traditionalist when it comes to this aspect of dating (when I am dating, because I’m thoroughly enjoying the single life at the moment)—it’s still your job to court. And as long as you’re with someone, that’s a job you never really get to clock out of (said with equal parts sarcasm and sincerity).

 

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In this piece, I’m offering a list of romantic date ideas. I’m well aware that most of us aren’t operating with a Hollywood-sized budget, so these suggestions run the gamut. As someone who admittedly over-plans, I once created spreadsheets packed with date, vacation, holiday, and birthday ideas spanning years—ready to be deployed at a moment’s notice (yes, I am a certified nerd). I can say with confidence that in past relationships—even when things eventually soured—one area where I was never criticized was thoughtfulness. As a shorter guy, this one element of relationship etiquette has always helped me stand out.

Without further ado, here’s a list of Valentine’s Day date ideas for her.

DINNER
 

RODIZIO-STYLE ALL-YOU-CAN-EAT STEAKHOUSES

These never get old. There are plenty of chains, and many of them manage to feel exclusive despite the all-you-can-eat format. In the New York metro area, the most popular options are Texas de Brazil and Fogo de Chão, with the latter being my personal favorite. Servers come to your table with various cuts of meat, while the rest of your plate is handled via a well-stocked buffet. I’d strongly recommend considering location—take a minute to Google interior photos. Once you land on a good one, the experience is almost always positive.
 

"EXOITIC" OR LESS CONVENTIONAL RESTAURANTS

I’d skip the usual Italian, Chinese, or Spanish restaurants—not because they aren’t great, but because those cuisines are oversaturated and, in my opinion, better suited for other occasions. Instead, look toward Thai, Nepali, Turkish, Nigerian, hibachi-style, or fusion restaurants. In New York, Cabana is one fusion spot I swear by, blending Latin American influences with a lively atmosphere. Years later, one ex-girlfriend still reminded me of the Thai restaurant I once took her to—proof that thoughtful choices stick. Thai Villa on 19th Street in Midtown Manhattan is a great example: elegant, visually striking, and priced reasonably enough to justify the experience.

 

DAY TRIPS

Sticking with the idea of giving her an experience she’ll remember, here are a few short-trip ideas. You can easily combine these with the dinner options above to plan out a full day.


HELICOPTER RIDE

Here in NYC, Blade has been heavily advertising helicopter rides in the $175–$225 range, primarily for commuters traveling between Manhattan, JFK, and Newark. If you’re near any major metropolitan area, chances are there’s a similar service available. While commuter-based, if you’ve never been in a helicopter, it makes for a memorable experience. Not interested in riding together? Get her a ticket so she can take a helicopter home from work one day instead of sitting in traffic.


WEEKEND COTTAGE GETAWAY

One year, I took a girlfriend to the Poconos for the weekend. The cottage included a Jacuzzi at a very competitive price, and the surrounding area offered everything from zip-lining to shooting ranges. It made for an unforgettable weekend. Consider something similar in your area—the Catskills if you’re in New York, or mountain and lake regions elsewhere. Most people don’t realize how many options are within a few hours’ drive.


SPA VISIT

Probably not the most unique gift, but what woman—aside from the most obsessive-compulsive germaphobe—doesn’t appreciate a self-care day? As always, read reviews and look at interior photos. Many spas offer package deals that include massages, pool access, and gift cards that allow flexibility. You can make it more appealing by turning part of it into a date, while also giving her a gift card she can use solo later on (maybe on a day when she’s particularly stressed out—with you).

 

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THE ARTS

Romance is the theme here, so I’ll spare you suggestions involving sold-out arena shows geared toward metal, hip-hop, or EDM fans. For couples, intimacy is the point.
 

SMALL JAZZ CLUBS

Musical tastes vary, but it’s hard to beat a hole-in-the-wall jazz club for an intimate live-music experience. Even if you’re not a jazz person, there’s something undeniably exciting about watching a small group perform just feet away. In New York City, places like Birdland, Smalls, and the Village Vanguard come to mind. Most have a one-drink minimum and solid finger food.
 

OFF-BRODWAY AND SMALL THEATER

Even smaller cities tend to have at least one local performance venue worth checking out. Off-Broadway productions—often staged in tiny theaters—create a more intimate experience. You can whisper, lean in, and actually focus on the dialogue. Smaller productions tend to rely more heavily on storytelling than spectacle, which makes the experience feel more personal. Plus, most of us have already seen The Lion King, Wicked, or Blue Man Group at least once.

 
CLASS INTENSIVES

Paint-and-sip nights have their place—great for early dates or random nights out. But for couples who’ve been together longer and want something more memorable, these ideas hit harder.
 

COFFEE CLASSES

New York–based 787 Coffee offers a “Learn Coffee in Puerto Rico” experience that takes you directly to their coffee farms. You’ll learn about growing, processing, roasting, and brewing over a two-day intensive. Prices start around $1,200. If that’s a bit much, private brewing classes at their New York locations run closer to $250. Why include this? Because the focus here is on unique experiences—and this definitely qualifies.

 

WINE CLASSES AND TASTINGS

February isn’t the ideal time for vineyard activities in the Northeast, but wine experiences don’t disappear in winter. Regions like the Seneca Lake Wine Trail offer seasonal events such as wine-and-chocolate pairings, which fit Valentine’s Day perfectly. Closer to the city, spots like Macari Vineyards on the North Fork or Millbrook Winery in the Hudson Valley offer tastings year-round. Save harvest-season activities for late summer or early fall—but don’t rule out winter wine weekends entirely.

 

THE SMALLER THINGS

While most of this piece focuses on bigger gestures, the smaller ones often carry more emotional weight.
 

  1. eCards – A thoughtful message first thing in the morning goes a long way.
  2. A Real Greeting Card – Taking the time to write something by hand still matters.
  3. Printed or Polaroid Photos – Physical memories last longer than scrolling.
  4. Flowers – Timeless for a reason.
  5. Chocolate – Godiva bags, assortments, or an absurdly large bar all work.
  6. Cake – Buy the whole cake, not a slice. Remember her favorite.
  7. Rose Petals – Classic. Cleanup is annoying, but the reaction usually makes up for it.


I distinctly remember an ex-girlfriend of mine posting a photo of her with a caption celebrating our relationship with her holding the five-pound chocolate bar I bought for her to boast about its size. It was something she brought up regularly in conversation when telling the many reasons why she was so into me. The little things will often create the biggest memories. 

 

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CONCLUSION

Valentine’s Day is a commercial mess—we all know this—but that doesn’t get you off the hook. You should be showing love year-round; Valentine’s Day just forces you to do it in overdrive. Don’t treat February 14th as a way to make up for neglect during the other 364 days. She’ll notice that more than anything you do on the fourteenth.

We hope this list gives you some solid ideas—and maybe even makes Cupid a little jealous. What’s the most romantic thing you’ve done on Valentine’s Day? Share your experience and join the conversation on our forum. Cheers.

 

Like This Article? Chat About It And More On Our Forum For Shorter Men!

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